I wonder if anyone will remember their first job interview as vivedly as I do. No, it didn't involve me making an impressive speech in front of the interviewer. No I didn't leave her spellbound with my mere presence, and nope I certainly didn't leave her office with a feeling like I'd be getting in there again (Not in a long time atleast!) . Things went a little differently from what you're probably imagining.
It was a bright sunny morning that day. I had woken up early, so had subsequently gotten ready pretty soon too. By the time I finished breakfast, I was in a jovial mood. I believed, nothing could go bad on a day that was :
A) so sunny and
B) a day on which I actually had the time to blow dry my hair (usually I depend on the Wind God for the needful.)
Everything went clock work. Until ofcourse- party pooper- the traffic!!!
Nothing can be worse than sitting in the car- in crawling traffic- for an interview you're running late- chewing on one's done-up nails.... wait! mine were unmade!!
What would have taken 20 mins on a day with average number of cars on the road, took a whooping 50!! God alone knows the hell I went through! None of the breathing exercises to calm myself, seemed to help. What with me trying the "breathe innnn-breathe ouuut" techinique I had learnt at a yoga class. Bad idea- cause I tried it amidst 10 dozen cars- all emitting cough inducing smoke!
Though 10 minutes late and a little jumpy, I made it to the office- A newspaper organisation for the post of a freelance writer. As I sat in the lobby fidgeting with my handbag, I couldn't be more nervous. I will survive it, I kept telling myself... Would do just fi-
"Miss Asheta Suresh...you can go up now" said the lady at the reception. She handed me an ID card of sorts that said 'visitor' in bold.
Why I was being made to wear that, when technically I was here on 'official' bussiness, I had little time to wonder. My latest pre-occupation was with the floor.
Ever been to those high end hotels that have floorings so well polished you could see yourself? So slick that you're scared you'll slip (especially if you have fancy footwear on. A pair that you thought was a good buy from some exhibition?!!) Well, I was in that predicament. Its not easy walking in slippery heels on a slippery floor. It makes your confidence slippery as well.
As I walked past a row of cubicles, I saw a group of people standing around (Probably on their coffee break, I mused) when one from the lot came striding up to me.
"You must be here for the job of the new recruit?".....If that was meant to be a question, it didn't sound like one. I mumbled something in the affirmative and went tailing after her. Then it happened. In being so absorbed in the task of sounding intelligable and smart, I forgot all about the flooring...and its unique quailty of making people go ice skating without any rollerblades.
If there is anything more embarrasing than going "whoops!!" in front of your interviewer without intending it to sound like the happy "whee!", I wouldn't want to know!
I'll refrain from putting you through any details of my interviewer's expression, my exclamation, and her expression. Lets move on now to the part where she took a look at my CV.
"Hmm....so you're a member of the Blue Cross society for animals...?"
"Yes! I'm a major dog lover!"
" Ohh..thats good to hear...So what do you do as a volunteer there?
"All sorts of things! I play with the puppies, take some for walks and always take them newspapers......."
Freeze the frame.
I'm here at a newspaper organisation. For the post of a newspaper freelance writer and I have the audacity to say that I take the dogs newspapers!!! For what??!!! To sponge their poop and pee!!!!!
All my prayers and wishes of every life time must to have paid off as the interviewer seemed to have not heard the last few words of the sentence....we moved on....
"So what are your areas of interests, Asheta? What can you write about?"
"Trivia!"
"Trivia?....what in trivia?"
Now how exactly is one supposed to answer this bouncer? I fell back on my famous mumble-bumble-jumble. She seemed to have lost interest half way when she asked suddenly "What do you think the youth of India is interested in today?"
That would've been an easy one to answer. So many things! Movies, Politics, Glamour!....so on and so forth. But no! I had to travel the road less travelled... or taken... or whatever else R. Frost wrote!
I said serenly- "spirituality."
"Spirituality! how so?!"
That did it. I lost my head completely. "With the advent of....with the coming of Shri Shri....There are alot of courses actually, of the Art of Living... and I happen to have done some....not that its of any importance here....even the sudden fame and focus on the other gentleman...Mr. err....Baba err...Namdev-"
"You mean Ramdev."
"Precisely!...well, the youth seems to be quite taken in and err...."
(And I intend being a journalist someday!!!)
As you must've gathered, the interview comprised of everything ridiculous, for it to be awarded the label of a Disaster. But the positive person I am, I won't to call it that. More of Catastrophic Learning Experience I'd say..... After all, how many people have had the good fortune of being called in for round two after such an interview?!! (wink, wink!)
