Wednesday, November 25, 2015

Body-maiming

I confidently walked into one of the retail branches of a popular health and wellness store to pick my best friend up something for her birthday. She's the kind who keeps up with latest beauty regimes and is almost always fashionably well groomed, so I thought buying her a lip gloss here and a body scrub there, among other things, might make for sensible items for a gift basket.

Little did I know that on entering the store, I'd be ambushed by over enthusiastic salesgirls detailing and remedying everything in my outward appearance that was wrong.

"Ma'am why don't you try this DD cream to cover dark spots? You have some on your face"
(Ouch.)

"Ma'am this is a scrub with special crystals to remove blackheads."
(Uhh, okay. I didn't know mine were that visible...)

"Ma'am this is a skin whitening cream, it has got many good reviews"
(Your point is..?)

"Ma'am this sunscreen has an SPF of one million. Prevents darkening and makes you fair"
(But I don't want to look...)

"Ma'am this face mask helps to remove dead skin and gives you a glow"
(Oh my god, lady! I was born brown!!)

Then, they shifted gears.

"Ma'am this is herbal medicinal lip balm... For cracked lips"
(Gee thanks. Now I'll keep licking mine self consciously.)

"Ma'am are you looking for some shampoos? This is anti dandruff and hairfall"
(Are you seriously looking at my hairline?!)

I don't know what it is with marketing, these days. When I'd learnt about it briefly in college, I knew it was about enticing customers into 'wanting' to buy. Not belittling them by having these hawk eyed women swoop down on anyone who doesn't look straight out of a Vogue magazine. I understand  the concept of demand and supply in this biz, and that it is keeping pace with our looks obsessed society (I'm somewhat in the business of outward appearances myself, so I Know!) but I think there should be a limit to this (not-so) subtle form of criticism.

Then there are also women you encounter at the salon. I am of the firm belief that when you visit such places, you should feel pampered throughout, not have to brave comments like:

"Aapke baal patle hai." ("You have thin hair.")
 I've come very close to saying, "Toh kya karu? Ugaau?" Loosely translated: "So what, should I start cultivating some?"

There's also the "Aapki skin bahut oily hai, pimples bhi hain." ("You have very oily skin, and pimples too.")
Realllyyy? I've lived with them for over 2 decades and would have Never known!

And the cherry on the top (at least in my case) has got to be "Why don't you go in for a Pearl facial? It'll make you look fair.."
Make it stop! Make it stop already!

I will not understand why it is assumed that Everyone HAS to be discontented with what they look like. I'm not saying I'm supremely confident. I go through phases of feeling pretty ugly too, but it's not something I obsess over all the time. And anyway, there are far more important and justifiable things to feel under confident about (!)
On that (slightly) comforting note, I have decided that the next time I have a brush with these smart alecs who go off about every perceivable body defect of mine, I'll either arm myself with a baseball bat (Hello there, prissy glass bottles) or adopt the Zen philosophy of being relaxed and not worry about things I cannot change. Namely, skin tone, texture, open pores, scars, blackheads, white heads, stupid heads, dunderheads ...