Read at your own risk.

Have you ever had a tryst with the supernatural? Ever experienced something that has given you goose pimples on your skin, when you realise that there is infact a superior being to man, and that you're probably in his presence at the given circumstance? Ever been stuck in such soup that you'd do anything to get out?! Well..... no, my story's doesn't have anything to do with the supernatural or any holy spirit (Mentioning them in that dramatic tone was just one way of getting hold of your attention) But it does involve me getting myself into pickle.... My favourite kind...
For those of you who don't know.... I'm not a risk taker. Not your average kid who shows their 'Jawani ka Josh' usually. You can call me boring if you like, it doesn't matter. But it so happened that on one fine Saturday evening, I felt quite unlike myself...
One of those times one wants to let one's hair down and do something rash... befitting a twenty yr old. So I called my friend up but told her I wanted to go for our "usual". (bike ride followed by juice at our favourite hangout) She willingly obliged and we set off. I let her be the pillion rider for once.
Instead of taking the normal route there, I took a detour. My notion of being an explorer, see. The initial plan was to go visit a scenic place of worship, but all of that went out of the window when I took to the wheel, or should I say handle in this case?!
Taking a vague turn on some vague street that one barely has a vague idea about, at 6.30 on a dusky evening is not the most sensible thing to do. Take my word for it. But it can also be rather scintillating to see where all the vagueness leads to (The initail impression only, ofcourse) After going along all the winding roads that had the population steadily decreasing, we reached our final destination. We were atop a small hill and had the full view of the entire city ( As far as I dwindling eyesight managed, atleast)
The first stars of the evening coming out and half the moon in the nightsky was enough to get our silly heads working in over drive. The cool summer breeze did everything to increase the urge to break into a song and dance sequence. But we managed to curb the instinct of turning into side-kick poets or worse still, B-grade Hindi movie dancers. After having soaked up the serene environment for sometime, we decided to call it a day and head home. We agreed to go back the way we came, because who on earth would take chances in figuring a happy route home in the dark? Not us. Nuh-uh! We were too chicken and made no bones in admitting the fact..... Destiny however, had different plans for us.
Humming along to a favourite song, I must've been pre-occupied because suddenly, the road didn't seem all that familiar to me. I must've taken a wrong turn along the way because to our dismay, the houses began getting sparse. The road began getting bad and we seemed to be driving into thickets trees more often than we would've liked. Ten minutes into the ride and some more twists and turns along the way... I had the complete sinking feeling. We were totally lost and seemed to be driving away from mankind. At one point, it got so lonely we were the only ones on the rugged road for what seemed like a mile.
No silly network on our phones. Running low on petrol and a stretch of a bad road with wilderness on either side was what lay ahead of us. The headlight was our only source of light besides the eerie half moon. All the Wordsworth-ish feelings we had not so long ago seemed to have evaporated. And fast. Its when one's stuck in such pathetic situations, do the world's 'never-watch-movie' list come's to life in one's head.
Suddenly, all the trash they dole out in the name of horror shows didn't seem so dumb. All the stupidest of ghost of movies didn't come through as so farfetched, anymore. And suddenly, a movie with a title as preposterous as 'Howra bridge se latakti hui laash' could have made us shiver in the dark. Its with all these highly uplifting thoughts, we rode on. I was dimly aware that we were riding uphill for a while.... and wasn't quite prepared for what we had, on the other side....so to speak.
I'm sure everyone who's reading this blog, has at some point been to a carnival and have also been on those sorry rides that give one the swooping feeling in the stomach. Yes, the ones that make you feel tizzy when coming down with great speed and from a great height..... Remember how loud you screamed?!.... However loud you must've been, it wouldn't have been half as bad as our combined yell, which (in retrospect) was at such a high octave that we were sure only the bats must've heard us. It was scary to be hurtling towards Lord knows what, at a speed of Lord knows what, with a mind full of all the cuss words that the Lord wouldn't want to know of what.
I don't want to say something heroic like "I managed to gain control of the situation and drove with great valour" towards whatever the hell I was driving at. I just remember spotting a lone bulb light at a distnce and I nearly sprinted with the bike. It turns out, it was a temple beyond which, we had the familiar roads and husstle bustle of normal life.
Phewww!!! What an expreience! Something to sit and tell my grand-children about, I presume. All in all.... One heck of a time we had. Being crazy, irresponsible, stupid.... but none the less displaying the famous "Jawani ka Josh" that we ought to have, at last.

College Life!

Bunking of classes,

attending free hours;

Sitting in the last benches,

sleepin odd hours!

Listening to music,

with one earphone;

Munching out of random tiffins,

everyone seems to own!

Eating in the canteen,

going out to lunch;

Packing in a meal together,

and calling it brunch!!

Sending PJ's through messages,

sitting in class;

Keeping straight faces,

stifling one's laugh.

Going for long drives,

sitting in the car;

Dividing equally,

one odd chocolate bar!

Watching stupid movies,

then cursing our fate;

Always reaching any destination,

fashionably late!

Sorting out misunderstandings,

and dealing with issues;

Smiling at the end of it,

through alot of tissues!

Coming up with many,

weird nicknames;

Each carrying a story,

undeniably very lame!

Its been simply wonderful,

and quite a joy ride;

We hate the thought of leaving,

of being on the other side!

But the memories will remain,

of the fun that we've had;

being at St. Francis

boy, was I glad!

My first Job Interview!! Phew!!

I wonder if anyone will remember their first job interview as vivedly as I do. No, it didn't involve me making an impressive speech in front of the interviewer. No I didn't leave her spellbound with my mere presence, and nope I certainly didn't leave her office with a feeling like I'd be getting in there again (Not in a long time atleast!) . Things went a little differently from what you're probably imagining.
It was a bright sunny morning that day. I had woken up early, so had subsequently gotten ready pretty soon too. By the time I finished breakfast, I was in a jovial mood. I believed, nothing could go bad on a day that was :
A) so sunny and
B) a day on which I actually had the time to blow dry my hair (usually I depend on the Wind God for the needful.)
Everything went clock work. Until ofcourse- party pooper- the traffic!!!
Nothing can be worse than sitting in the car- in crawling traffic- for an interview you're running late- chewing on one's done-up nails.... wait! mine were unmade!!
What would have taken 20 mins on a day with average number of cars on the road, took a whooping 50!! God alone knows the hell I went through! None of the breathing exercises to calm myself, seemed to help. What with me trying the "breathe innnn-breathe ouuut" techinique I had learnt at a yoga class. Bad idea- cause I tried it amidst 10 dozen cars- all emitting cough inducing smoke!
Though 10 minutes late and a little jumpy, I made it to the office- A newspaper organisation for the post of a freelance writer. As I sat in the lobby fidgeting with my handbag, I couldn't be more nervous. I will survive it, I kept telling myself... Would do just fi-
"Miss Asheta Suresh...you can go up now" said the lady at the reception. She handed me an ID card of sorts that said 'visitor' in bold.
Why I was being made to wear that, when technically I was here on 'official' bussiness, I had little time to wonder. My latest pre-occupation was with the floor.
Ever been to those high end hotels that have floorings so well polished you could see yourself? So slick that you're scared you'll slip (especially if you have fancy footwear on. A pair that you thought was a good buy from some exhibition?!!) Well, I was in that predicament. Its not easy walking in slippery heels on a slippery floor. It makes your confidence slippery as well.
As I walked past a row of cubicles, I saw a group of people standing around (Probably on their coffee break, I mused) when one from the lot came striding up to me.
"You must be here for the job of the new recruit?".....If that was meant to be a question, it didn't sound like one. I mumbled something in the affirmative and went tailing after her. Then it happened. In being so absorbed in the task of sounding intelligable and smart, I forgot all about the flooring...and its unique quailty of making people go ice skating without any rollerblades.
If there is anything more embarrasing than going "whoops!!" in front of your interviewer without intending it to sound like the happy "whee!", I wouldn't want to know!
I'll refrain from putting you through any details of my interviewer's expression, my exclamation, and her expression. Lets move on now to the part where she took a look at my CV.
"Hmm....so you're a member of the Blue Cross society for animals...?"
"Yes! I'm a major dog lover!"
" Ohh..thats good to hear...So what do you do as a volunteer there?
"All sorts of things! I play with the puppies, take some for walks and always take them newspapers......."
Freeze the frame.
I'm here at a newspaper organisation. For the post of a newspaper freelance writer and I have the audacity to say that I take the dogs newspapers!!! For what??!!! To sponge their poop and pee!!!!!
All my prayers and wishes of every life time must to have paid off as the interviewer seemed to have not heard the last few words of the sentence....we moved on....
"So what are your areas of interests, Asheta? What can you write about?"
"Trivia!"
"Trivia?....what in trivia?"
Now how exactly is one supposed to answer this bouncer? I fell back on my famous mumble-bumble-jumble. She seemed to have lost interest half way when she asked suddenly "What do you think the youth of India is interested in today?"
That would've been an easy one to answer. So many things! Movies, Politics, Glamour!....so on and so forth. But no! I had to travel the road less travelled... or taken... or whatever else R. Frost wrote!
I said serenly- "spirituality."
"Spirituality! how so?!"
That did it. I lost my head completely. "With the advent of....with the coming of Shri Shri....There are alot of courses actually, of the Art of Living... and I happen to have done some....not that its of any importance here....even the sudden fame and focus on the other gentleman...Mr. err....Baba err...Namdev-"
"You mean Ramdev."
"Precisely!...well, the youth seems to be quite taken in and err...."
(And I intend being a journalist someday!!!)
As you must've gathered, the interview comprised of everything ridiculous, for it to be awarded the label of a Disaster. But the positive person I am, I won't to call it that. More of Catastrophic Learning Experience I'd say..... After all, how many people have had the good fortune of being called in for round two after such an interview?!! (wink, wink!)

Just Me!

I won't say I am cool and funny,
or that I'm too nice; I won't say I am this or that,
I'd rather be in disguise!

I like for some people to know me,
others' I would not;
Call it haughtyness or attitude,
Or whatever else you've got!

Its not like I don't give a damn,
its not like I do not care;
Just tired of being sacrine sometimes,
A little too much to bear!

For all those who're reading this,
with their eyebrows raised;
Yes its crazy coming from me,
but I'm tired of the good ol' ways!

Now a lil spunk's required, gonna be less sappy and senti;
This should've come sooner,
for Godsake I'm turning twenty!

Two decades old and some milestones,
not too much to my credit;
But alot of things I'm glad I've done,
that I never wish to edit!

For everyone who is my friend,
thanks for being around;
For reading this and bearing up,
you really deserve to be crowned!

No the poem wasn't a confessional,
I wasn't pouring my heart out;
Just trying my hand at poetry,
to see how well it turned out!

Bow-WOW!!

If only I could sum up cute, crazy, adorable, annoying, pesky and naughty in one word, life would be simpler. If I try describing my dog, I can never seem to come up with adjectives enough to express the levels of happiness, but also annoyance he causes.
Just the other day, he put me through the most mortifying experience ever, though in retrospect it was also the most ribtickling. Before I start off on my story, I'll give u a short introduction to my dog. Cashew's a sprightly young pup ( all of 5 months!) and a doggie of few words...or should I say, a few barks?! He's almost a vegan, he sleeps 15hrs a day and loves my mom to bits. Thus, in almost everyway, he's an angelic dog to have around...except for a few..errr...goof ups, should I say?!
Like one of Shakespeare's protagonists, Cashew has just one fatal flaw. His inabilty to not chomp on anything thats in his line of vision. (!) He loves to chew just about everything! His variety of that, ranges from stationery to shoes. From telephone wires to eyemakeup! From clothes to the newspapaer! Anything will do!! Alas! That's his Achilles heel, and my poor dog's taken to task for it.
Last Saturday, we had guests visiting and my tale begins at the moment the jolly uncle and aunt walked in. After the cursory bark, Cashew got down to do his sniffing and background verifying. I suppose he must've been happy with their credentials, (in doggie world things like that do exist) thus giving them the security clearance.
The aunty cooed and cawed about Cashew's goodlooks and uncle dropped in a line here and there of his good manners in between discussing the stockmarket with my father. All this while, the doggie in question sat serenely at my feet. That is, until our domestic help arrived.
I must mention here that he has a soft spot for her....which is all very sweet....just that the soft spot is in a not-so-nice way!! He loves annoying the living daylights outta the poor soul.-
He tugs at the mop while she's mopping, he does the conga when she's sweeping, and he loves stealing clothes from the laundry basket. And Saturday happened to be one of those days he carried out his ritual....this time, in full view of uncle, aunty, dad, mom and a very, very embarrassed me!
We were just done with tea and the uncle and aunt were contemplating making a move homeward, when all of a sudden, Cashew made his departure. Ofcourse, his presence was not missed much by the grown ups, who were seriously discussing what next to do with their life.....
That is, till he made his re-entry. That was a kodak moment. The youngest yet most senile member of the family came into the drawing room with his latest loot from the laundry line adorning his head -My sister's lingerie!
Aunty's jaw dropped. Uncle stopped in mid-sentence. Mom looked like she had just witnessed a banshee singing. Dad lunged for a newspaper to hide behind and I lunged for my mad dog whom I was determined to kill in the next few minutes.
I was able to retrive the offensive article and get it out of sight, just in time to come back and see uncle and aunty making their hasty exit and my parents glad to see their receding figures.
What followed was a lecture, of which I had to bear the brunt (As my sweet sisters weren't around) .
Ofcourse, I'm not gonna put you through it, cause that'd be torturous (and as a rule I wouldn't do that to someone who has taken the trouble to read my blog) but that's hardly the point anyway!
Thus ends my story of what a nut head my dog is, that finally brings me to my quest of finding a word that means six adjectives at the same time!
Still working on it!!!

Tch! Tch!

Oh Lord! Its that time of the year again! When there'll be mushy songs in the air, people dressed in differen shades of red and pink and the scene set for lovers romancing behind red roses....eeeugh!
As cliched as it may sound, many of us singletons hate this time of the year...any wild guesses why? (yawn!) well for the very obvious reason that we aren't dating anyone yet, and honestly we don't like to see the happy couples all so happy. Sounds like a confession, doesn't it?! Hell, it is one!
Since the time I fully understood the meaning of 'Valentine's Day' (I must've been in class II!) I always wanted to have a Valentine on this special day. Irrespective of what I would do with this Valentine for the rest of the year, I had no idea. But I still wanted one. As I grew a little older, there came a phase when I totally detested the sight of 'boys'. They were just these annoying bunch of hyper, crazy, pig-headed, bigger versions of bullies in school.
Then, after a couple of years, when I got out of the phase of 'Boys-are-everything-horrible', there came a time when I was at peace with the world. I was happy if they didn't tease me and if they just minded their own business. Alas! how short lived this period was!
Very soon, I was in the awkward stage of looking at guys in this whole new light. As people with whom you could have a proper conversation with and who wouldn't suddenly point a spoon at you and go "Bam! bam!" and run in the opposite direction.
Suddenly, they occupied a very important role in our girlie conversations.
Then came the time when guys were not only the 'hottest' topic of every conversation, but also the most entertaning form of amusement! With the all the amusement they provided, however, they were also a major cause for concern. What with the heart breaks they caused and the agony my pals went through after every break up....
But now as things stand..... I'll just give you the most cliched line taken from one of the best selling books that deals with the 'guys vs girls' topics.... that you can't live with them and you can't live without them. They just form an important part of your life (directly or indirectly!) whether you like it or not!
Presently, I'm just going to wear a smile on my face and go listen to some mushy songs. So what if I don't have a Valentine yet? Who says you can't be your own Valentine? Who said you can't gift yourself something or buy yourself chocolate? And best of all, you don't even have to share that bar of chocolate!
Whoever said being single doesn't rock probably never got to eat the entire thing themselves!